Television status: Deceased
Friday, February 10, 2006| Posted by Matthew Nyquist
And you thought playing games on a 20” TV sounded bad enough, now I’m completely fucked. Yeah, it’s dead all right, dead as Darth Vader, pogs and the Atari Jaguar (some would say it was never alive, but whatever).
Should severe desperation and boredom take over, I could grab myself some composite cables and hook los tres sesenta into my video card, providing me with 4.1 surround, a screen that doesn’t have the curvature of a basketball, AND no more of those little fuckin’ red streaks. Well hey, why the fuck not, right? Sure, it’d probably be fine, until Jesus got word I was making the 360 work with 17 diagional inches, decend from heaven, and slap me in the face. It’s like forcing Lance Armstrong to run the Tour de France with a tricycle. Such a small area hardly does a device like the 360 justice.
So then, perhaps it’s a hint from J.H.C.? That I should be moving into the world of High Definition? Certainly a good excuse. Hell, it’s a good excuse to get a TV with two speakers. Understand, I’ve been gaming in the world of monotone, for years. Two-channel stereo is one giant fucking leap in the right direction.
So while Sir Paperweight Boobtube sits over there, staring at me with its dead eye wide open, I pass the time with Gunbound. It’s so simple – shoot object A onto target B – but it’s got depth, possessing that mix of competition and challenge of consistency that makes racing games so damn addictive. It’ll keep me entertained until I find a new TV, or I steal Break’s.
So, emo kids, until Showtime, remember, it’s down the road, not across the street. Make it count!