Rainbow Six: Patriots is Real, And You’ll Fight the Tea Party In It

Dear Reader,

Ubisoft has announced a new “Rainbow Six” title for the 360/PS3/Windows, called “Rainbow Six: Patriots,” due for release in 2013. Contrary to what you may be thinking, “Patriots” will not feature Rainbow teaming up with Tom Brady on a covert mission to videotape New York Jets practices.

"We're just here to record your hand symbols."

Instead, the antagonists will be a conspicuously wink wink nudge nudge militarized version of the Tea Party called the “True Patriots.” Their feeling is, the American government has been “irrevocably corrupted by greedy politicians,” as well as gotcha questions. So they’re gonna start shooting people until special interests stop being such dicks.

Yeah, I know, I don’t like it either. The simple, evocative genius of “Rainbox Six: Vegas” this is not. There’s really no other details at present, but here’s hoping some new gameplay mechanic or graphical overhaul makes this all look better than it sounds.

_AA

everyone I know needs what I’m selling

 

  • Antonio Tersigni

    Actually I’m pretty sure since the people are fighting against what they perceive to be “Corporate special interests”, I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to be militarized Occupy ____ers.

    Or it could be both.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Allen/7605503 Andrew Allen

      It is kinda both, really, although only the Tea Party focuses on government corruption; Occupy is more about the financial district. 

      I just think an army led by Sarah Palin is funnier. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/dustin.hall1 Dustin Hall

    I think the terrorists will be just vague enough in their ambitions to be perceived either way (like Horoscopes?). If you hate Tea Partiers, then that’s who you’ll identify the villains with. If you’re against the ‘Occupy’ movement, then you’ll see similarities there. 

  • Eric Robbins

    Someone didn’t watch the concept video.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Allen/7605503 Andrew Allen

      Oh I watched it. A very well-made video that is neither gameplay footage nor a cutscene, so in my book, it doesn’t count.